A Message Of Hope

In grade 10, I was depressed. There’s no doubt in my mind that what I experienced for a few years in high school was one of the lowest experiences I’ll probably ever face in my lifetime, although there’s still much time ahead of me. I was diagnosed with Complex PTSD, as some of you may know from other blog posts/by knowing me, and had a general indifference towards life and being alive.

I’m sharing this as a message of hope.

I know there are lots of protestations when the phrase “It Gets Better” gets thrown around but, for myself and many others, it really can get better. Thanks to counselling, my openness with my experience, amazing friends and family, and my passion for mental health and helping others, my life really has gotten so much better since then & I have healed so much!


I was talking about this with one of my best friends the other day. We’d both gone through very low lows throughout high school, which was a mere few years ago through both of us. While we were discussing it, we realized how remarkable it was that a few short years ago, we experienced so much self-loathing and truly thought nothing would ever get better. Today, we’re both overall happy people and are surviving and thriving, and I think it’s just so cool to look back on how far we’ve come.

Of course, I still have many dark days where I don’t feel like I’m good enough and feel hopeless. I think everyone does. The important thing is is that I’m no longer forcing a smile on my face and pretending that I’m okay – I actually am. You can be too!

If you’re in a dark place right now, I hope you are able to reach out and overcome what you’re going through. I hope you can one day realize that, not only is life beautiful but that you are too. There are so many resources available to you. There’s no shame in accessing them! If you ever need help or someone to listen, I’m here.


Good luck in your journey!


International Day of Happiness!

Today is the International Day of Happiness (note: check out that link. There are awesome things there)!

Today, take a moment to do some things that make yourself and other people happy! You can use this article as a guideline if you’re having trouble thinking of examples 🙂

1. A quote that makes you happy


I live my life by this quotation! It always makes me smile and serves as a reminder that there are so many wonderful things in the world; sometimes you just have to dig a little deeper to find them.


What makes you think that elves are any more magical than something like a whale?


2. A picture that makes you happy


My dog in a field of wildflowers. The fact that I get to see him in a few days makes it even better!

Also, selfies with my dog:

3. A place that makes you happy

The beach by my house is one of my favourite places in the world. Whenever I’m stressed out and need to calm down, I take a walk by the lake and automatically feel better.


4. A song that makes you happy


5. A movie that makes you happy

Any Marvel movie ever.

All in all…

… There are so many wonderful & happiness-inspiring things & people in this world! Today, on #InternationalDayofHappiness, let’s all try to take a moment, breathe, and be mindful of the things that put a smile on our faces and a SPRING in our steps!

PS – happy first day of Spring!



20 Reasons Why I Love Sam on Her 2oth Birthday!

There’s been a lot of these “__ reasons why _____” posts going around the internet lately, and I’ve always enjoyed reading them. Every time I do, I tend to close the tab feeling better, laughing, or having something to think about. So, I figure this would be a great format to one-up my birthday post from last year as I wish one of my favourite people a very happy 20th birthday.

To Sam,

Welcome to your 3rd decade of life – I’m so proud that we have stuck together through 12 of your birthdays so far, and more to come. Our friendship is one of the things I cherish the most in this world and I’m grateful for you every day of my life! Here’s why…

1) We’ve been friends for such a long time

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+many more prior to “the Facebook” (you’re old now, you have to start calling it that)

2) Which means we’ve seen each other through the awkward preteen phases.


(And if we can stick by each other’s side through that, we can do anything)

3) …. Looooots of awkwardness…

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4) … Seriously… It’s embarrassing…

preteen 6

5) But that just means that we got to#GlowUp together!

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6) You’re always there for me.


Even when you’re really far away and have never even met the people I’m crying over.

7) You always take the time to make me feel loved.


Especially when I need it most (somehow you just know).

8) You accept my weirdness…


9) … And I accept yours –


10) We can just be ourselves around each other.

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11) We’ve been by each other’s sides for the big moments in life…

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12) … And the little ones.

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13) We’re way too cool for words.

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14) We’re basically a couple because we’re a package deal

couple 2

15) No really… *cheesy romantic quote*

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16) You were blessed with the gift of hilarity and always keep me laughing.

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17) Being reunited is something we look forward to for weeks

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18) And when we’re together again, we always have the best times!

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19) Saying goodbye to you sucks, which only shows how great it is to have a friend like you in my life ♥

20)& I know we’ll be friends forever, #WAVELENGTH

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Thank you for everything you are, Sam. I hope you have a wonderful birthday, because you truly deserve one. I’m so sad I can’t be there to celebrate with you, but I’ll be back in a few weeks and we will have a great time!


Love always,


“You’re Stupid and You’re Wrong!”

Picture this:

You’re sitting across the room from me in a lecture room crowded with a few hundred of your acquaintances, when the teacher asks a question. After a few minutes of awkward silence and the noise of papers being shuffled around, you decide to try to answer, even though you’re not sure if you’re right. You mix up a term though, and the teacher gets in your face and yells “YOU’RE WRONG! WHAT YOU SAID IS INVALID AND YOU’RE IRRELEVANT AND WRONG AND NOW YOU’RE GOING TO FAIL THE CLASS! I CAN’T BELIEVE HOW WRONG YOU ARE! HAVE YOU EVEN BEEN LISTENING IN MY CLASS?!”

– wtf, right? Chances are, you’d be really confused if the above situation ever happened to you. Teachers are there to teach you and help you to learn, because they supposedly want you to succeed and become more informed about their subject of interest.

Let me get something straight: I’m not one for censoring reactions to oppression. People who have been systematically and repeatedly oppressed, mistreated, and silenced have every right to address their perceived oppressors in any way they feel just. Some people are incredibly rude and disrespectful and spew their hate speech to whomever will listen to them, and they totally deserve to be called out on it.

But here’s the thing… 

What I’m frustrated by is the fact that A LOT of people who claim to want social reform through education and understanding refuse to educate…


And that just doesn’t make sense.

[From here on out, I’m just going to be talking about people who may say/do something offensive without realizing it; people who genuinely don’t get it. Bear that in mind.]

When somebody tells you you’re wrong and refuses to explain it any further – or explains it in condescending, hostile/aggressive language – what are the chances that you’ll actually take something positive from it? Next to nothing, I’d bet. You’d either retaliate and become equally heated, become defensive and avoidant, or become really upset and think the other person is just mean or a bully. The same thing happens when trying to address oppressive language or actions from someone who may not understand the issues or terminology at hand: you won’t get very far if you try to “correct” them by attacking them.

I genuinely don’t understand people’s logic when it comes to things of this manner. I understand that “we don’t need to tiptoe around oppressors feelings” and that “oppressors shouldn’t feel like their oppressive opinions are valid because that’s harmful”, I really do. But, like it or not, they’re still people with thoughts and feelings and experiences that are likely very different from the people that they (maybe inadvertently) are offending. And yeah, you’re right; they don’t have the same experience as you. They don’t get it and, in an ideal world, these clueless people would take the time to peruse the internet for hours and attend meetings and events to in an attempt educate themselves… but, clearly, this is not an ideal world, and the people who actually do actively learn about these issues tend to only be those who are already involved and enlightened – I want more people than that to join positive social movements.

So what? Should the oppressed be forced into being patient and painstakingly explain to these people why what they’re saying/doing is wrong?

Of course not. If you’re a member of a group that has been wronged, I don’t think that should be forced to cater to anyone, but I really don’t see what you’re hoping to accomplish otherwise. For example, when a male doesn’t understand the concept of “male privilege” and gets defensive about the concept, you probably won’t gain an ally by calling him a misogynistic, sexist women-hater who wants all women to suffer horribly. But, if you take a few minutes to explain that the concept of male privilege does not refer to every single male individually, but to males as a gender due to the systematic historical oppression of and violence against women, you might get him to understand. You might even get him to care, agree with you, and support you. Personally, I think that’s a much better alternative.

fighting oppression

As a final thought, continue to react to perceived oppression in whatever way you please. That’s on you. But before you do, think about your goals and values. Think about what you’re trying to accomplish, because I think you can accomplish so much. Will you fight ignorance by forcefully standing up for yourself, even if it means missing out on an ally? Or will you be willing to have the possibility of failing after you have the patience to truly and compassionately teach someone who doesn’t understand the struggle? The choice is yours.

Yes, We Exist Too.

There are certain things that I’ve always struggled to put into words for fear that I will hurt others when I speak them. Topics of equity and equality seem to be at the forefront of the list of things I want to talk about, but never know where – or how – to even start. So I’m just going to start, and hope that my ramblings make some coherent sense and don’t offend.

Black history month is a beautiful thing. I truly, truly love it. I love that the often unheard history of a marginalized group is brought to the forefront for once; I love that the triumphs and beauty of black folks are heard alongside the struggle that they too often bear. I think it is extremely crucial to celebrate diversity and encourage pride in every facet of our identities, whether it we’re talking about sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, nationality, gender, genre of music, or anything in between.

During the University of Ottawa’s 101 Week, there was an amazing event called Take Back the Night (TBTN). TBTN is a rally/educational opportunity where women “take back the night” for themselves. It is an event to raise awareness about the pervasive danger that women face, and the threat that we feel, whenever we walk at night. This is something very near and dear to my heart, and it’s so applicable to so many. Who among us females have never been followed by a sketchy guy in a car? Who hasn’t had a random man on the streets come up to us and persist that we allow them to take us home? It is an event that occurs far too often, and TBTN works to call perpetrators out and support individuals who have experienced/will experience/fear experiencing this sort of incident. Furthermore, the event additionally is a way to support women in all aspects of gender-based violence. I was very excited to attend.


I was even more excited when, at the beginning of the ceremony, the audience was informed that there would be a focus on marginalized groups of people whose voices often went unheard. (Intersectionality – yay!) There were a few pieces on gender-based violence as a whole, and then members of the black community spoke about their instances of gender-based violence and explained how racial discrimination against them often interacted with the sexism that they endured. These pieces were eye-opening and moving, and I felt myself (as an Oriental-Canadian) relating to the concept that racial stereotypes and gender stereotypes are often experienced hand-in-hand.

And then the event was over.

The problem for me is that, in trying to be intersectional, there is a tendency to perpetuate a hierarchy, and certain groups of people are left feeling even more marginalized than they previously did. This is where it gets tricky, because I want to stress that I am deeply happy that the voices of marginalized groups, like the black community, are being heard. I do not feel resentment towards events that focus on issues faced by black folks, nor do I wish they would stop. In fact, I believe much more needs to be done to eradicate systematic racism. However, I really wish that it wouldn’t stop there.


I have seen so many posts about stereotypes and discrimination that affects certain oppressed groups, but I’m concerned about the rest of us. We all know about Black History Month because it is taught in our schools and there are galas and assemblies, but did you know that Asian Heritage Month exists too? I didn’t until yesterday, and I think that’s a problem. Japanese people were historically oppressed and enslaved here in Canada, and so many people don’t even know that! And what about Aboriginal rights, because (holy crap) this still have a very long way to go. We’ve all heard of the Gay Pride Parade (yes, I’m aware that in this case ‘gay’ represents the wider LGBTQA* spectrum), but what about bisexual pride, and asexual pride, and everything and anything else?

Again, I want to stress that I am not advocating that these events stop taking place, but rather that more events for different groups start. I acknowledge that it’s so difficult to find the space and time to advocate for all of these groups, and there are so many intricacies involved. It’s hard to care about people who you do not identify with, but I’m tired of not seeing people trying.


Feel Good Study Snacks!

Hi friends! It’s that time of the semester again: finals season (dundundunnn)


It’s a time filled with a lot of things; to name a few : the sound of the textbook spine opening for the first time, sweatpants and messy buns, and – of course – lots and lots of stress. 

Something that often goes hand-in-hand with all the stressful feelings is STRESSFUL EATING. We’ve all been there, I get it.


When you first start having the mental breakdown, the big bag of greasy chips and the entire pizza you ordered seems like a good idea. Comfort food to help you get by, right? Wrong! 

While there is absolutely nothing wrong with a little bit of comfort food in moderation, at the end of the day, you know it will leave you feeling sluggish, unhealthy, unattractive, and totally unmotivated – kind of the opposite of the way you want to be feeling after a “quick” study break.


It may take a bit of extra planning and motivation, but healthy study snacks can go a long way to helping you feel productive and in control during a busy and stressful exam period! Certain foods (ex: whole grains, fish, blueberries, seeds and nuts, broccoli, eggs, and more – see 1 and 2!) have even been found to boost brainpower and increase memory and concentration. Talk about super foods. It doesn’t have to be anything too fancy either – there are tons of ideas floating around for healthy, quick, inexpensive, and easy study snacks. Try some out & help yourself stay feeling good this exam season!

Check out these awesome articles to get some great study snack ideas: 1, 2, and 3


Happy [or at least not totally miserable and guilt-ridden] studying, you intelligent babes!