This Song Perfectly Describes My Experience with Mental Health Issues

As much as I love to empower and uplift people, it is extremely important to me to talk about issues in truthful ways, raise awareness, and destigmatize the conversation surrounding controversial topics. It’s a necessity to encourage empathy and understanding, and I hope that by listening to this song/reading the lyrics, people can sart to see how difficult and overwhelming living with mental health issues can be (I discuss my own interpretations of the following at the end of the article. Thanks for being open-minded.

“Lovely Sad” by The Maine

Ugly little feelings
Crawl inside my head
What’s the point in leaving
This California king-sized bed?
What-if’s
And the should-have’s
They start to eat my brain
The shadow of my youth has
Made the sun go black again
I look around and I don’t see the pretty things
The evil thoughts upstairs they don’t need company
This broken glass it reflects back
The person I’ve become

And now
Here I am
I feel numb
On the fence
On the run
Spill my guts
What an act
I am sad
But to me I’m lovely sad

Imaginary numbers
Control the ones we love
Fooled by affectation
And something up above
If you’re in love with diamonds
A simple death you’re dying
A wasted life to me
Here we are all liars
Just hoping to get higher
Than everyone we meet
Huxley said we live together but we’re always by ourselves
If you don’t like this type of weather you can move to someplace else
Significance is rarely found underneath your couch

So now
Here you are
Feeling numb
On the fence
On the run
Down and out
Such a drag
We’re all sad
But to me we’re lovely sad

I’m not at all claiming that everyone’s experience with mental health difficulties is the same as mine, and it’s important to not expect all individuals with mental illness to act the same. Everyone is affected differently, and each person’s experience is valid and should never feel invalidated. I learned about the importance of validation through Sashbear‘s creators in the context of helping those with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), but it’s also extremely important in day-to-day interactions with anyone and everyone.
What is BPD?
“Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a serious mental illness that causes unstable moods, behavior, and relationships. It usually begins during adolescence or early adulthood.” [Source]
Back to the Song…
To me, this song is a perfect representation of a lot of what I feel when I’m at those low points of mental health. The entire first verse is accurate and easy to relate with. It’s difficult to understand for those who haven’t experienced it, but at times people who have mental health issues find it hard to complete what may seem like the simplest of tasks; for example, getting out of bed can seem impossible and having a conversation can feel extremely tiresome. These feelings are all exhausting, but it can be really hard to confront them and break the cycle of negativity, since the sad/low can begin to feel comfortable, normal, or easier to deal with than the effort it would take to get out of the funk (hence “Lovely Sad”). That’s what the song means to me, at least.
Even though this week’s Song Saturday wasn’t as uplifting as they usually are, I really hope I made some people think, and others feel heard.
xoxo
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